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The Excuse ‘Blow-Out’ Pattern ~ L Michael Hall PhD

Have Excuses Held Y ou Back ?

Sabotaged your Success ?

Prevented you from Becoming Empowered ?

Once upon a time I worked with an Expert Excuse Maker. He had an exquisite ability to explain why

he couldn’t do this or that, why this or that NLP pattern has never had any impact on him, and why he

didn’t believe that this would help either. He was an expert at excusing himself from being

responsible, governed by the same principles and rules as others, and why he ‘just couldn’t do NLP

on himself’.

At first I challenged the excuse itself.

“So when you make a picture of your home and especially of your kitchen  ... and you see or sense

being there, you can’t make that picture move away and get smaller ...”

“Well sure, I can do that.  That’s not what I mean”.

“Oh, so the part of doing NLP on yourself is that you can’t see the more resourceful you, the you for

whom doing NLP on yourself is no problem, and think of some time or event or situation where it

might be hard and swish your brain to the Resourceful Y ou. Is that what you’re saying” ?

“Well no. I can do that ...”

“So you can do NLP on yourself” ! I said interrupting him.

“No, not really, not where it counts”.

And so this went on for some time, he excused every counter-example as not really what he meant. I

next pointed out this pattern of discounting the counter-examples and continuing to excuse himself

on the grounds of vagueness. As he began to recognize that pattern I then asked him if that really

served him well.

“Does this really enhance your life and empower you to do the neuro-linguistic magic that you very

well know how to do ? is this what your life is about” ?

Upon getting a strong ‘No’ to that and amplifying that ‘No’ until it felt strong and decisive, I then

asked him if he would be willing to say ‘No’ to his excuses, to stop giving them any power , any

credence, any validity. He said ‘Y es’.

“So you are fully willing to take a stand here and now, this day , to stop giving your power away to

these wimpy little excuses that have been sucking the life out of you ? Y ou’re wiling to give up the

pleasure of excusing yourself from adventure, risk, growth, contribution, expending energy and

living life with more gusto ? Y ou’re willing to stop taking counsel of your excuses when you know

good and well that they are but excuses” ?

“Y es I am” ! he said with more strength and determination and fortitude than I had ever heard from

him.

“Really” ?

“Definitely” !

“Then do it. Imagine one of those wimpy, silly , non-sense and power-draining excuses trying to get

you to excuse yourself from life and imagine saying ‘No !’ to that excuse with firmness and

strength”.

“NO !” he shouted and stomped his foot.

I paused and let the sound of the strong and definitive No settle, then I said “Good, that was great ...

now as you imagine some of your highly desired goals, well-designed outcomes, those that fit your

values and fulfill your mission ... just take a step now forward allowing any silly, wimpy excuse to be

stomped under foot”.

And he did.

The Birth of a New Pattern

That’s how this pattern began. Just a conversation with a person who wanted to be more congruent,

more authentic and more aligned with his own values and visions. A few weeks later I received a call

from one of his friends who had noticed a significant difference in him and asked me about what

process I used. I detailed out what I could remember of the steps and he said “Well it really blew out

that old excuse, I’ll tell you that”.

And with that I received the name of the pattern – The Excuse Blow-Out Pattern.

Exploring Excuses as a Meta-Level

Since we’re talking about a mental phenomenon, an ‘excuse’, we should begin by clarifying

precisely what we mean. So here it comes.

What is an excuse anyway ?

What kind of a language form is an excuse ?

How do we create and store and carry excuses with us ?

How do we discern an excuse from a true reason ?

We all create excuses. In fact as children most of us became pretty skilled at inventing excuses for

getting out of things. Something would break or an accident would occur and some adult would ask

about its cause and we would explain why we should not be held accountable:

She made me do it.

He looked at me in a funny way.

I was tired.

It just slipped out of my hands.

And so our career in excuse making began. Then as we learned more sophisticated ways of thinking,

reasoning, arguing etc we became even better at the art of excusing ourselves from responsibility.  We

even learned we could excuse ourselves by excusing ourselves.

I’m sorry; excuse me, I’m such a klutz, I never do anything right.

And surprisingly that often not only gets us off the hook, but brings others to our rescue.

So what precisely is an excuse ?

Originating from Latin, ‘ex- and causa (cause or explanation), an excuse is a an explanation about the

cause of something. And why would we want to ‘explain’ a cause ? T ypically to ‘explain away’ our

part in the cause. In this way we invent excuses in an attempt to remove blame from something, as an

appeal for a pardon, and/or as an exemption or release from something. When we ‘make an excuse’

we offer a way of thinking, reasoning and arguing in order to relieve us from responsibility . When we

do this we create a set of representations so that our ‘ability to respond’ does not play front and center

to the experience. This makes an excuse a set of ideas, beliefs and understandings about various

factors, causes and contributing influences that brought something about.

Linguistically an excuse is a noun-like term that designates a set of actions. This makes it a

nominalization ... a pseudo-entity that has no external reality, but only exists in the head as a way of

thinking and punctuating our understandings about causation. Excuses do not exist ‘out there’, they

only and always exist inside.

This means that an excuse involves a meta-level frame of reference that we use to put some action or

experience into a different box. Accordingly we can now categorize excuses in various ways.

There are legitimate excuses – true causes or influences and illegitimate excuses – reasons that hold

no water, explanations that don’t make any sense.  Accurate reasons enable us to understand how and

why we cannot legitimately blame or accuse ourselves or another. Inaccurate and illegitimate

excuses try to cover up true responsibility to escape consequences. Stupid and silly and wimpy

excuses that deserve no attention and only sabotage our ongoing development and effectiveness.

When W e Use Reasoning for Excusing Ourselves from Life

Good excuses are those healthy and legitimate reasons that allow us to consider various constraints

in reality: physiological constraints, social constraints, time constraints, relationship constraints,

health constraints etc. W e should listen to these and intelligently work with them. I typically excuse

myself from working 24 hours in a row.  There would have to be some kind of emergency situation

before I would override that basic health constraint. I excuse myself from chasing an idiot driver

down the highway because I’m not authorized to do that, don’t have the time, don’t have the

resources to do anything about it if I caught the driver etc.

There are a lot of good excuses. These comprise valid explanations that we use as we conceptualize

our world and our role in it. But then there are the bad excuses ... those silly, wimpy and stupid

‘reasons’ that we use to dis-empower ourselves, undermine our ef fectiveness, let ourselves off the

hook from assuming responsibility for ourselves etc. And it is these kinds of excuses that we need to

address. So, what’s your ‘reason’ for not doing something that you really want to do ?

Are you using a frame of true explanation or a mere excuse that just gets you off the hook so that you

don’t have to look at what you thought, felt, said or did and take corrective action ?

Are you just excusing yourself from work, energy, emotional investment etc ?

Are you just reverting to a more infantile style of coping ?

Some wimpy excuses arise as just old habits, reactive responses with little thought to it. ‘I would

begin to work my plans but it’s just not the right time ... but I’m just too tired to exercise ... but I might

get embarrassed ...’

When we find some actual excuses then we have a sick and ill-formed reason that we’re using to

prevent ourselves from having to face consequences. And that only prevents us from using pain to

alter our way of acting.

Do you have any of these false reasons, these excuses that you are sick and tired of ? that does not

serve you well ? that may be stopping you from achieving some of your hopes and dreams ? then

bring it on and let’s blow it out.

During the past 25 years NLP has not had an official Blow Out Pattern for Excuses but no more. Now

there is no longer any excuse for failing to blow out our excuses. Now, after all these years we finally

have a pattern for actually blowing out excuses.

So would you like to have the ability to eliminate excuses in your life ? What if you could eliminate

any or all excuses ? W ould you like to be able to facilitate the process of blowing-out excuses in the

lives of others ?

In order to do so we would have to understand the structure of an ‘excuse’ (how we excuse ourselves

from things) and how to utilize our knowledge of that structure as we eliminate it. Here the meta-levels of Meta-States exposes the higher neuro-semantics of ‘excuses’.

An excuse involves a multi-level structure so that at the primary level we have a desire to achieve or

do something, but at a meta-level (a meta-state) we have reasons that prevent us, that prohibit. W e

have justifications that allow us to excuse ourselves. W e have disbeliefs that prevent us. W e have

prohibitions that forbid us from. W e have skepticism that bathe the desire with doubt. W e have ideas

that cause us to discount the desire.

We often have patterns whereby we both want to do something and cannot get ourselves to take

action. This leads to maladaptive patterns and fills us with negativism, reluctance and avoidance.

The Excuse Blow-Out Pattern:

1:  Access  an  Excuse

i: think of something you want to do that’s very important to you, an outcome that you know

is well formed and ecological for you, something that would really improve the quality of your life

and yet ... just as soon as you do, you find that numerous excuses come to mind which stops you from

acting on your desired outcome.

ii: what would you like to do about X (work, career, health, fitness, relationships etc.) ? T ake

a moment to imagine just going ahead and doing that thing ... and then notice what happens. How do

you excuse yourself from it ? Listen to your internal voice.

The first step here involves accessing a state wherein you feel an excuse. Now feel that excuse.

Notice where you feel it in your body.  What does it feel like. In your body?

How do you know to call it an excuse ?

Remember, we are going after silly , wimpy, stupid and un-useful excuses with this pattern, not

legitimate reasons.

2:  Quality Control the Excuse

i: is it just an excuse ?

ii: do you want this excuse ?

iii: do you need it ?

iv: does it serve your life at all ? does it enhance you or empower you ?

v: if there is some part or facet of the excuse that you might need or want to preserve, what is

it ? what facets of the excuse may serve a positive purpose for you ?

3:  Preserve the V alues of the Excuse

i:  take a moment as you go inside and preserve any part of the excuse that might prove

useful to you in some way at some time. Suck out of the excuse any element (a value, belief,

understanding) that could be useful. Suck it all out so that the rest of the excuse remains as an empty

shall, devoid of any usefulness at all.

ii:  notice the value of the reason – an understanding, belief or state that you want to keep

with you ... note it and store it as something you can have apart from this particular stupid excuse.

iii: is it now just an excuse ? just an empty shell of an excuse ? [Y es]

iv: if not, repeat until you just have an empty shell of an excuse left.

4:  Reject the Empty Shell of the Old W orn Out Excuse

i: access a strong ‘NO !’ state, a ‘Hell No !’ state. Amplify that state of ‘Rejection, Refusal or

Disgust’ that comes out as a ‘No’ fully until you feel it very strongly.  Anchor it spatially in a spot and

feel it in your hands and in your feet. Let it radiate throughout your body.

ii: when you have it accessed very strongly, imagine the empty excuse immediately in front

of you and step into that excuse with the ‘NO !’ state and S tomp on the excuse with the power of your

‘Hell No !’ – S tomp it to the ground.

5:  Test

i:  now imagine the desired activity that’s ecological and notice what happens as you think

about moving toward it ... What do you feel ? What comes to mind ? Do you have any excuse lurking

that you might use to excuse yourself from life, love and commitment ?

6:  Access  Y our Executive Decision State

i:  will you do this ? will you allow it to become an attractor in your mind so that as you think

of this activity, how you will do it will simply become a matter of discovery and of building the

resources so that you can – and will, will you not ? Go to the part of your mind that makes decisions

and commission it to go ahead and decide to engage in your desired activity.

Using the Excuse Blow-Out Pattern

We came up with this pattern in May 2000 and have used it on various excuses – excuses that people

have used from exercising, staying fit, eating right, practicing a skill, launching a new venture,

reading and researching, becoming the most extraordinary Neuro-Semantic Trainer you can be etc.

Excuse Exploration moves us up the levels of mind to our understandings, expectations,

history, memory , imaginations, beliefs etc. In so exploring these higher levels we flush out meta-level ‘dragons’ that may be threatening from behind the curtains and creating a sense of fear ,

apprehension, dread etc. The reason for the first step, for actually activating a movement toward a

goal is that ‘excuses’ often hide and don’ t show themselves until we begin to act. Then they come out.

Then they make themselves heard.

The reason we then use the ecology check to Quality Control our ‘excuses’ is to sort and separate

between legitimate and rational excuses and illegitimate and irrational excuses. Some excuses are

valid, useful and intelligent. Some ‘reasons’, ‘understandings’ and ‘evaluations’ do indeed excuse us

from a particular course of action ... temporarily or forever. I have some reasons that excuse me from

going ahead with my love for gymnastics and going to the Olympics. I have some reasons that I

consider pretty legitimate that I use to excuse myself from many other activities that I do have some

interest in.

By Quality Controlling our excuses, we flush out —

legitimate / illegitimate

reasonable & rational / unreasonable & irrational

appropriate / inappropriate

timely / untimely

fitting with Social Reality / ill-fitting to current Social Reality

etc

Typically most excuses suf fer from the lack of precision and specificity. That is they are too over -generalized. Accordingly as we simply inquire and explore the specifics: when, where, how , with

whom, according to what standard etc we purge the excuse of its fluffy and fuzziness and make it

much more specific (this is the Meta-Model Strategy). Frequently that’ s enough. Doing that leaves

‘the excuse’ as a mere empty shell of an exc use with no power to stop us.

Access your ‘No !’ and Stomp on it.

Sometimes however, there were some valuable understandings, motives, intentions and ‘values’,

within the excuse that we want to preserve and keep with us as part of the way we sort and separate.

We may want to use such as part of our criteria for making decisions in a given domain. Accordingly

we separate the chaff from the wheat and keep the wheat. This allows us to lose nothing and gain

everything. It creates a mental clarification about our goals and how to get there. It allows us to

become much more intentional in our stance and everyday orientation.

Once we have a mere excuse, an empty shell of an excuse ... we kinesthetically access a strong sense

of rejection, ‘No !’ or even ‘Hell NO !’ Then expanding that to our entire body, into our hands and feet

and then getting a sense again of moving toward that goal, we take a step forward into tomorrow

stomping on the old empty shell of an excuse. This helps to future pace the process so that the excuse

blow-out pattern begins to generalize into the way we move through the world.

The final step comes from the meta-stating process of the Secrets of Personal Mastery. Here we

move to ‘the part of your mind that makes decisions’ and commission that higher executive level to

take responsibility for solidifying this new understanding as a higher frame of mind. This confirms

and solidifies the process and enables us to sustain the benefits of the pattern.

{{  I’m looking for an NLP ‘procrastination’ specific technique, meanwhile wonder if:

excuse = procrastinate = excuse }}